Family and Friends
You have come to this page because you are concerned about a loved one. You have seen her cut back on calories, skip meals, and say she isn’t hungry. You have seen her go to the bathroom after meals, you have found evidence of purging on the floor, and you have found it in garbage cans. You have seen a loved one quickly gain weight, and you have found food hidden in a closet or the trunk of a car. You are concerned. And you need to be.
As your loved one is slowly being consumed by an Eating Disorder (ED) it can feel like there is very little you can do. You feel helpless and out of control with the behavior. You have begged, pleaded, ignored, and even threatened the individual with no results. You are now at your wits end.
Here are some suggestions:
1.The only person who can “make” the sufferer eat is the one with the ED.
2. If the sufferer lives in your house and you are in charge of preparing meals, prepare the meal as you normally would. You are in charge of providing carbohydrate, protein and fat at each meal. 3. Your loved one is responsible to choose what she will eat and how much. 4. Make meal time a happy time. At the very least make it a time where food, weight, and the ED are NOT discussed. 5. Ask questions if you think there is something wrong. 6. Know your limitations 7. Your loved one has MANY rules in her head regarding eating and eating behaviors. Do not talk about diets or your own weight issues. 8. Give her the space she needs and give her hugs. 9. Do not comment about another person’s weight or compare your loved one to another person. 10. Seek your own professional help if you are overwhelmed by your loved ones behavior. 11. If you see her acting out at a meal time i.e.: cutting food into small pieces, chewing then spitting food out, hiding food… wait till after the meal to let her know you noticed the behavior. Then, discuss with her a safe way you can express your concern then next time you see it happen.
